An Audience With the King

By Jefferson

Moving Target, Spring 1997, issue 23

There’s always a gap. What's your favourite part of being a bicycle messenger? Record money days? The sun coming through after months of relentless rain? Leaving offices as soon as you enter them? A smile from a certain receptionist? For Elliott, winner of the 96 Bike Park Alleycat Series and the 97 Valentine's Day Alleycat Massacre, it is the pure adrenaline rush you can only get crossing Park Lane from the southbound side into Hyde Park against heavy traffic.

Many a seasoned messenger (o.k., donkey) has trouble watching King El slip through Cambridge Circus or the like. It stops your heart, especially if you've seen carnage before, But slip through he inevitably does. El has an admirably low accident record. "I've only fallen off 3 times. It's a question of road sense really, isn't it? May be once every 3 months you find, once you've done something, that you relied on somebody else for your safety. That's bad news really." Elliott puts most upsets down to the courier not paying attention, citing a certain fluorescent yellow muppet (not Muppet, mind) screaming down Conduit Street on the inside, just ahead of El, and smashing into a pedestrian that he really should have seen through the car windows. El's theory equates taking risks on purpose with an enhanced perception and awareness. It is the opposite of your average messenger not realising the risks he is taking and therefore bumping into things. Often.

The same principal taken to an extreme has made the man so successful in alleycats. The Ed calls El 'The Undisputed Champion', partly because of his record and partly because the other contenders are increasingly reluctant to race.

In three years of working together, Elliott has only made me angry once. With my pension staked on a top ten placing at least, he failed to qualify for the finals at the World Championships in Toronto, August, 1995. "I was in TO for a laugh, I didn't really think that I could win. Buffalo would say: ‘He's one to watch for.' I didn't know why he was saying that. But, having won a few alleycats and done well at Vancouver, now I've got the attitude that I can win. The man who wins isn't necessarily any better than the man that comes 2nd. His mental state is stronger. He believes that he can win it. "You ride for a laugh or to take part ... then you find yourself in the lead ... it's like ‘oh well, that's handy ... I may as well go to TO for my holiday.'"

The Human Powered Rollercoaster in Vancouver was a surprise score for winning last years Bikepark Alleycat series. With big-time sponsorship from Dunhill cigarettes (for all your ready-rolled needs ... smoke em guy, you know it makes sense), The original Toronto Alleycats put on a figure-of-eight indoor track extravaganza in a warehouse. What it had to do with couriers or cigarettes or much else was open to speculation.

Free air tickets were sent to alleycat champions all over the world. When El got on the plane in London, he found himself in the heady company of 95 World Champion Lars Urban from Bremen and British-born Munich-based female sprint World Champion Crissima Pearce. In Vancouver the group were met by the obligatory stretch limo and ferried into town like rock stars. The competition began with a time trial to narrow down the number from the 84 entrants to a manageable figure for the heats. Riders rode three lap warm-ups and then the fourth was clocked. The international messenger community were joined briefly by real cyclists. "The Canadian track squad came down and took it real seriously for the Time Trial. They then found themselves racing in the first heat against some guy with a fag in his mouth on a mountain bike. They were a bit nervous. They hadn't ever made a right turn before. The professionals scampered, the meek were weeded out, and the heats of 10 laps (at about 11 seconds a lap) between four riders commenced. The riders were on road bikes, track bikes, mountain bikes, and the usual messenger hybrids in the same heats. It made for interesting racing, to say the least. "The course was a little too tight for a track bike", said our man in the thick of it. "The guy that eventually beat me in my heat tried to get around me for three or four laps. I wouldn't say he cheat ed, but he muscled his way around me," Lars eventually triumphed, avenging his disappointing result at the World Championships in San Francisco.

Those of you with the technology should seek out HIDEOUSWHITENOISE website at http://www.hideousewhitenoise.com/ for an excellent overview of the planning and execution of the track itself as well as the event. The event came home to TO on April 12 and 13 on an even bigger track. Which messenger do you reckon won the London qualifying alleycat race?

Appropriately enough, with Larsov missing (small detail of the birth of a little champ), Joey Dias, TO's Alleycat King finally took the big international win that many feel should have been his before now. The final was dramatic: 3 TO riders, DC fast guy Chris battled over the 50 laps in front of a baying crowd. With first Chris and then Joey pulling out half-lap leads, it was a hotly contested race, ending with Joey the clear winner, and Chris in 2nd place, de spite folding up of his bike in the home straight.

After that, El is hopeful that this summers Alleycats will be better attended than last years. In American cities like Washington D.C., they regularly get 60 messengers out in worse weather than we get 12 out in." He despairs at there only having been 17 racers in the Valentines Massacre when there were loads of prizes on offer and the opportunity to win a free trip to Toronto. "I don't understand it. Stringer should be racing, shouldn't he? Part of the attraction of being a courier is those moments of pure ... danger ... adrenaline. Great.

The call of furniture design, which has lured so many a top courier away from the circuit, is also on the agenda. Despatching full-time doesn't fulfil El's constant need for growth.

"I think there's a point where ...you've been daring it a certain amount of time... if I didn't feel that I was developing in another direction, I'd need to be doing something else. Improving your skills base or your knowledge base: that’s kind of necessary.. You need to keep learning,

For as long as there is a gap, though, there will be a place for El on circuit. And for up starts aspiring to his stature? "Go faster. The faster you go, the safer it is ... you can always brake and slow down quite quickly. You can't always speed up as quickly. You've always got more potential when you're going faster. There's always a gap."

London Alleycat pics from the Timbuk2 International Alleycat points series

If you have comments or suggestions, email me at messvilleto@yahoo.com