This is Your Company on Drugs

by Fur

Mercury Rising #2, November 1991

If you want a job at Executive Courier, you've got to piss in a cup. The new drug testing program debuted in October has, unsurprisingly, slowed the flow of applicants, according to manager Joe Kent. So far the program, administered by Bay Medical, is only for new hires. Testing may be expanded to random and post-accident situations, but all who were hired before the program started are exempt. Kent says he’s personally opposed to random testing, but likes the post accident idea, which has the potential to release the company from liability for accident settlements in the event of positive test (presumably the drug-addled messenger would then be on the hook).

Kent hinted that a positive test for only marijuana might not preclude one’s hiring. Noting that the Yerba Buena stays present in samples for more than a week after indulging, he offered, ‘People have the right to do what they want on their own time. I just don't want them doing this on the job.


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